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Home › Dad of the Month

Walt Close

By Jenn Director Knudsen

Each month, iParenting.com spotlights a father who inspires and moves us, who embodies the qualities that we all admire in a person, a man and a father. Above all, the Dad of the Month is dedicated to his children. Rich or poor, famous or not, he shines as an example of what fathering is all about.

Walt Close of Raleigh, N.C., is a big man. At 5 feet, 11 inches tall, 215 pounds and sporting a 34-inch waist and a 50-inch barrel chest, he commands quite a presence. At his gym, where he frequently works out, fellow weightlifters ask him if he ever served in the Special Forces of the U.S. military. "He's an Incredible Hulk in terms of his body," says Close's long-time friend Roger Arnott. "He's a fit man."

But looks can be deceiving. Although Close – Walther Allison Close – is a bulky guy, his size belies his gentle nature and touch, especially where his 7-year-old son, Cody, is concerned, say Close's friends and relatives. "Cody has described his daddy as 'strong and gentle,'" says Close's wife, Linda. "He is both. To see Walt, you think strong; to know Walt, you think gentle."

And it's not just physical strength Close has in abundance. He's long on mental strength, too. Were he not, he wouldn't be able to maintain his unusual work and family schedules.

A Stressful Start to Fatherhood

Close, 45, says in the early days of their marriage he and his wife used to talk about having two, maybe even three children. But Linda miscarried twins and then gave birth to Cody prematurely. So the couple reassessed, believing perhaps they'd "dodged a bullet," as Close put it, and so decided to dedicate themselves wholly to their one child and put childbearing behind them.

Close says Cody was born at 34 weeks, weighing only 3 pounds, 11 ounces, and had to remain in the hospital's special care nursery for 12 days. Though Cody quickly thrived and was sent home – at 4 pounds, 2 ounces – with a very grateful and relieved mom and dad, Close says he'll never forget their experience in the first weeks of Cody's life.

"It was scary when he was in special care," Close says. He is pretty certain he would be the exact same dad to Cody had his son been born full term and not required 24-hour monitoring. But upon further reflection, he believes his soft touch with Cody is a carryover from his first, terribly anxious days as a father.

For example, he and Cody never roughhoused, an activity lots of moms reserve for their husbands and that lots of dads seem programmed to do. "I've just always been gentle with him in that respect," says Close, despite the fact most dads believe it's their duty to toss around their kids, especially boys.

"Initially, I didn't feel comfortable bathing him," he says, wondering how he'd gently get his comparatively huge hands around his tiny son. "Even if I wake up in the middle of the night, I still go in and check on him and give him a kiss." He adds that peeking in on his son, now a healthy first grade student whose physique is a mini-version of his dad's, became "a routine" after Cody's spate in the special care nursery.

Sleep? What's That?

Close says now that Cody's in school six hours a day, five days a week, his life is easier than it once was.

Wanting to care for their son on their own instead of giving that job to a daycare provider, Close and his wife both took a significant chunk of time off from their jobs after Cody was born. "We just wanted to be able to raise our son," Close says. And he and Linda wanted to reduce Cody's exposure to illnesses that run more rampant at childcare facilities than at home.

Linda left her management career, not planning to return to the work force for at least six months, and Close took off three months from his job as a hospital pharmacist. "He was the first man in his workplace (to our knowledge) to ask for a paternity leave so we could share the first three months of parenthood together," Linda says.

But after Close's three months were up, he didn't return to a job with traditional 9-to-5 hours. Hospitals stay open all night, and so do their pharmacies. Close worked – and still does – the 9:30 p.m. to 7:30 a.m. shift. He works seven days straight at Raleigh Community Hospital and then gets the following week off.

During Close's "on" weeks at the hospital, from the time Cody was a newborn until he started preschool at 2 1/2 years of age, Close returned home each morning in time for Linda to leave for her sales job. He took care of Cody the rest of the day, cooking simple meals for him, napping when his son did – twice daily as a newborn – and then again when Linda returned from work.

"That was actually the easy part," Close says, referring to Cody's two-nap-a-day habit. But right around Cody's first birthday, he moved to one nap a day, hindering his dad's shuteye. "The routine of feed-change-sleep in little blocks 24 hours a day was not too dissimilar from working third shift," he says. "I think this really cemented a bond between Cody and me because of the countless times [he fell] asleep on my chest after a feed and change."

Not only was Close operating on interrupted sleep during his weeks at home, but he never got enough of it. Linda says he never complained about that arrangement, though Close concedes it was rough going at times. "Some days you have to be mentally tough to deal with that," he says, adding he believes his level of physical fitness helped him deal with his inconsistent sleep patterns.

"What was amazing for me about Walt is he would work the [third] shift ... and then watch Cody during the day with hardly any sleep," says friend, Arnott. Then, as testament to Close's stamina, as well as to his devotion to his family and his health, he'd work out in the afternoon. "He's just an amazing guy," Arnott says. "You don't find many people like that in this world."

Close gets more sleep these days. Today, with Cody in school full time, Close says life is easier – and more restful. During the day, he'll catch up on his sleep and have time to complete day-to-day tasks, such as maintaining their cars, yard and the household.

And his body. Close works out at least three to four days a week, playing racquetball with friends, lifting weights at his gym or even doing pull ups on Cody's monkey bars in their backyard. "Cody's fort has a workout area under it, complete with several sets of dumbbells," and other equipment, Close says. "This makes it easy to catch a quick workout outside while Cody is playing with me or his next-door neighbor friends, Nick and Kate."

And Close always has Cody in tow, no matter where the pair goes during his weeks "off." "I have always included him in every activity to have him be my little helper," he says. Close totes his son to soccer, swim and baseball practices, as well as medical appointments, the grocery store, birthday parties "and anything else that might happen between 9 a.m. and 6 p.m. when Linda is working," Close says.

Not surprisingly, Close's love of sports has rubbed off on Cody. They love and participate together in swimming, racquetball and soccer. In fact, Cody is on a soccer team for kids 7 years old and younger that Close coaches and Linda manages. Close leads Cody's team, the CASL U-7 Dragons, in Saturday games and Wednesday practices, and the kids do pretty well – the team's fall season score was six wins, four losses and one tie.

Water skiing, though, trumps his love of any other sport. It's his No. 1 activity, and not only is he very good at it – having won a couple amateur tournaments and participating in two to three each summer – but he applies the same patience and gentle touch he shows Cody to his teaching style on the water. "He's really good with teaching people and kids how to water ski," Arnott says. He adds that he first met Close on a water skiing outing and only had tried the sport a few times previously. But after a few lessons with his new friend, "He taught me how to slalom and barefoot," he says.

And Cody's been in the water and on skis since he was just 2 1/2 years old, squealing with excitement when his dad would hold on to him while riding atop Close's skis. "That's such a good memory," Close says. Now a full-grown kid, Cody still loves skiing on top of his dad's skis, but given his bigger size and wish to always go faster, that's a harder chore these days.

"I think parenting and coaching mirror one another. Both require patience, perseverance, diligence and lots and lots of positive reinforcement," Close says.

Like Father, Like Son

Cody's disposition is perhaps the best indication of Close's dedication to the thing most important in his life – his son. "It's very obvious that his world revolves around Cody," says long-time friend, Jo Ellen Yeargan, who, along with her husband, Barry, also is Cody's godparent and would-be legal guardian should something happen to Walt and Linda. The Yeargans and Closes used to live next door to one another but for the past eight years have lived 45 minutes apart, with the former living in Hillsborough, northwest of Raleigh.

Jo Ellen, a logistics planner who is near Close's age but has two children in their 20s, says Cody not only plays a special role in her life but is special in his own right. "He definitely has his manners where they need to be," she says, adding Cody never skips sending thank you notes for gifts and other special occasions and is a very sensitive young child, more so than other children his age. She credits both Walt and Linda for that personality trait of Cody's, and Jo Ellen stresses that the three of them do most everything together.

But Jo Ellen says the adult-like manner in which Close handles Cody – whether he's disciplining him or explaining a concept to him – probably has a lot to do with the child's easygoing manner around both kids and adults. And Cody most likely has never heard his father give him short-shrift explanations like, "'Just because' and 'Because I said so,'" she says. "He is an outstanding dad."