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Mike Mann

By Teri Brown

Each month, iParenting.com spotlights a father who inspires and moves us, who embodies the qualities that we all admire in a person, a man and a father. Above all, the Dad of the Month is dedicated to his children. Rich or poor, famous or not, he shines as an example of what fathering is all about.

"I owe him the world," says Dusky Mann of her fireman husband, Mike, and in a way, she does.

Dusky Mann, a 27-year-old customer service representative from Pryor, Okla., knew when she married Mike Mann that he didn't want children. Like many women, she loved her husband deeply and wanted to have children with him, but had grown to accept his decision. "We had been married for a few years, and it seemed that he would say, 'Let's wait until we've been married five years, until you're 25,'" Dusky says. "He kept wanting to put it off."

Nature, however, had other ideas, and after several months of female difficulties, Dusky went to her doctor to check up on the possibility of ovarian cysts. Turns out it wasn't cysts – it was twins.

Of course, they didn't know immediately that it was twins. It wasn't until Dusky was 18 weeks along that the doctor told them. Everyone told Dusky that she shouldn't be feeling the babies move yet, but she was. When she learned she was having twins she understood the early movement. "At 18 weeks we found out together we were not having just one baby, but two," Dusky says. "With tears in his eyes, Mike rubbed my feet as the ultrasound technician scanned our growing family to make sure they were healthy."

What a difference in a man who felt that his life was complete without children!

Mike Mann is a 30-year-old fireman, EMT and now the father of two beautiful twin girls. Like most fathers, his first reaction was one of shock and then elation. Dusky recalls Mann calling a friend he hadn't spoken to in years just to tell his friend he was going to be a daddy. "I just felt like so many other people always said that they wanted kids to fulfill their life," Mann says. "I felt like I always had what I wanted. But my girls are the No. 1 thing in my life. I even tease my wife that she is No. 2 now with Haily and Baily being tied for No. 1."

The pregnancy wasn't without concerns, though. The Manns first heard the term "monoamniotic twins" when Dusky was about 22 weeks along in her pregnancy. The doctor spent about an hour quietly doing an ultrasound. Suddenly he left the room saying that he couldn't find it. He came in a few minutes later with another doctor, and they both agreed that the membrane separating the twins was not there. They were sharing the same sac.

Monoamniotic twins are identical twins that share the same amniotic sac and placenta. Monozygotic, or identical twins, occur when one sperm fertilizes one egg. This fertilized egg then divides, resulting in two or more identical zygotes. The timing of the division determines the separateness of the placentas and amniotic sacs. When division occurs after eight days following fertilization, fetuses share a single placenta and a single amniotic sac (monoamniotic). About 5 percent of identical twins are monoamniotic.

The complications that can occur with amniotic twins are numerous, including tangling, twin-to-twin transfusion and one twin getting the bulk of the nutrition. Losing one twin or both was a very real possibility.

"It was very frightening to know that the children I always dreamed of, the children I almost never had, might not survive due to a complication," Dusky says. "I cried for a week when we found out because I was scared I might lose them."

This time in their lives took its toll on Mann as well. "I was a little worried [about the risk involved], but I knew God would take care of them," he says. "I was more worried that something would go wrong, and we would have to make a choice between Dusky and the girls."

But according to Dusky, Mann was her rock. The Manns went from monthly appointments to two appointments weekly. The new, more advanced facility was 45 minutes away, and every appointment now included stress tests and ultrasounds. In spite of the increased hours Mann was working, he only missed four doctor appointments.

Mann increased his hours in an effort to save money for doctor's bills and travel expenses. The Manns were expecting the girls to be in the NICU for a month or more, so they would either have to make a daily commute or stay with them – both of which would take money.

"I was afraid I would go into labor and he wouldn't be able to get us to the hospital in time," Dusky says. But she knew why he was working so hard, and there wasn't really anything they could do about it. About 30 weeks into her pregnancy she began having headaches and was on medication to ward off premature labor. It was at that time the Manns suffered another crisis and Dusky learned just how much of a hero her fireman husband really was.

At 32 weeks of pregnancy Dusky's father passed away. Beyond the family's normal grief and shock, everyone was concerned that Dusky would go into labor early.

"Mike was our pillar of granite," Dusky says. "He took care of me, my mother, brother and sister. He made the arrangements that we could not. We all say to this day we wouldn't have made it through without him."

For Mann, doing what he did was just his way of taking care of his family – doing what he was supposed to do as a man. "I was probably the only one that could have made those decisions for the funeral at that time," Mann.

"He held me and our unborn children," Dusky says. "He made me feel strong and helped me to carry them a few weeks longer."

In spite of all the complications that might have happened, the Manns were blessed with a trouble-free delivery by C-section. "It went a whole lot smoother than I thought it would," Mann says. "Everyone was really surprised that they were not entangled and with how much they weighed."

The girls were both over 5 pounds, about a pound heavier than the doctors thought they would be, and were perfectly healthy. "I was just so excited," Mann says. "But I really just knew that the fun was about to begin."

Once he had all three of his girls, the fireman who didn't want children proceeded to fall head over heels in love with his daughters. "It is fun to watch them grow," Mann says. "Baily and I have our own special greeting for each other. We stick our tongues out. Haily and I do raspberries."

Dusky is amazed watching her husband with their girls. "It's wonderful knowing that we made these two perfect little angels, and to see him hold them is the best feeling," she says. "He looks like a proud daddy."

To Dusky, her husband is, quite simply, a hero. "I would like people to know that he goes without sleep for an emergency call, a house fire or a car accident," she says. "He stops and helps people if they have run out of gas or have a flat tire. He takes care of strangers when they need him the most, and he took care of our family when we needed him most."